Yeah get me, 4 Delias.

The wife said her dinner of bangers, mash and onion gravy was, and I quote, “lovely.” Oh yeah, get me. I’m domesticated and winning.

Had a successful-ish day yesterday picking away at e-mails and bits of work that needed to be done. I’m still talking to The Underbelly about a venue for [...]

DELIA RATING:

My mate Yan is domestic goddess. He spends his days listening to Radio 4, polishing door hinges and bleaching his tea spoons. He has a vegetable patch, a house rabbit and occasionally lets loose a knowing sigh at a melancholic Larkin line. Like Tom Hodgkinson of The Idler he shuns ‘housework’ in favour of [...]

Yesterday I went on The Verb, a weekly show about writing and language on Radio 3 presented by the bard of Barnsley Ian McMillan. It’s always a treat to chat to Ian, a true professional and excellent radio presenter. Also on the show was my good friend Joe Dunthorne talking about his novel Submarine, which [...]

I’ve been back a couple of days and I’m still not sleeping right. Was up at 5am this morning. Feel fuzzy and sick. A day at work is really the last thing I feel like now.

Went to The Arts Centre last night and saw John Hegley. He was his usual top-notch self. Would it [...]

G apostrophe day!

I arrived Friday afternoon at 3.40pm and was met by my grinning, smoking brother outside the baggage terminal. The domestic flights in Australia are a return to the good old days of minimal security, anyone can wonder into arrivals. To be honest, I’d have thought that makes it easy pickings for bag thieves, [...]

I leave to go to Sydney in about 2 hours. In the meantime I have to finish off the bottle of Cooper\’s Pale Ale I bought on the first day. Yum, beer for breakfast. Don’t worry though, I also have the finish off the coffee, so they’ll probably just cancel each other out. Either that [...]

I haven’t said exactly how hot it is. It’s 37 degrees today. Yesterday is was 42. Just so you know. It’s mental. I want to come back to this place.

My dream-like reverie in Adelaide is almost at an end. I have been here days but it feels like weeks, in a good way I hasten to add. I have spent much of the time alone reading or talking to myself. Good times indeed. I don’t think I have totally shaken the jet lag off, [...]

Tonight I supported drummer Billy Cobham and his band, with included, strangely because I met him in 2005 when I did the BBC Radio 2 cabaret gig, Guy Barker. I did a 20 minute set to promote the big show tomorrow. I was in front of 1500 people at the Persian Gardens. I didn’t really [...]

I went to Government House today. The Governor and his wife did an official meet and greet and threw a lunch for about 70 festival artists. I was sat at the centre table with the Governor, his wife, two of the Festival’s main sponsors, the festival director and a charming woman called Kerry Heysen who’s [...]

Horizon Apartments, Adelaide

I shouldn’t be left on my own for two long. I drank four bottles of Cooper’s pale ale yesterday and giggled until I fell asleep. I woke at about 6pm feeling groggy and set out to find Nova Cinema where Josie Long was doing her show. It was her first night and she [...]

The following is my travel diary:

Australian Travel Diary

14.44 GMT - Sunday | On a coach in Norfolk

Left Norwich for Victoria coach station at 14.10. Managed to push in front of the doddering old couples to get to the back seat. No one sat next to me. Ah, leg room and no fuckwits eating sandwiches all [...]

Aldershot

The highs and lows of tour. It’s the biggest cliche. I’ve said it hundreds and times at Edinburgh, on the road, at festivals. There’s no logic to it, some days are great, some are not.

Not that Aldershot was terrible. It just that we only had 10 people in the audience. 10 people. Not great is [...]